Hibernation

I had started a post several times in the past two months. It is a very dark and difficult piece for me to write, and I kept getting stuck at the same place. I noticed the post is becoming easier for me to write, but that's because I'm getting further away from the subject. Maybe one day I will post it, but today is not that day. I just have been struggling with trying to get the words out to describe what I've been going through, that I haven't been able to do much else, and haven't been able to write anything. Today I woke up happy. I felt like I woke up out of a deep, horrible sleep much like a "hibernation" from my old self, that takes place through the winter for many animals.

This week (all but Monday because I was at school until 8 o'clock because of parent teacher conferences) I have gotten home and either gone for a walk or a jog. Yesterday was not a great day, and I got home a little later than I planned. I debated about what I should do when I walked In the door, because I wouldn't have enough time to go for a run. I decided to just go for a short walk to the end of our property line and back (about a mile and a half). Even though the wind was biting on the way back home, it was quite refreshing.

The dogs came with me and ran ahead in front of me and I feel like they too felt quite refreshed. I feel like we were coming out of hibernation. This morning I woke up and played "squeaky" with Pippin for half an hour, and he seemed a lot happier too. I think we are all starting to peek out from our winter's sleep and adjusting to our new lives and starting to embrace it. Things haven't been weighing as heavy on me lately and I am so happy with my life. I am happy with how our house is coming along and we are able to do a little Something every day. I am happy with our "baby chickens" and excited we will have fresh eggs at the end of the summer. I am happy that we ordered our garden supplies and we will have fresh raspberries, and strawberries, and apples, and corn and squash, and peas, and beans. I am happy with our lives.

I am so at peace right now, and I am so happy.